Recently I saw it like this. Someone was sitting on an aisle seat, reading a book, while someone in the aisle was hovering above them, staring intently at that same book. When the reader turned the page, the hoverer continued reading, still not broken out of her trance. I thought the flip of the page would let the hoverer realize that she was invading the reading space, but she seemed oblivious to how rude she was being. I almost wanted to tap the seated woman and whisper that the hoverer was reading everything over her shoulder and unless she wanted a shared experience she may want to readjust herself.
Reading over someone's shoulder on the metro is not ok, but it's even worse to then make a comment on it. I realize we're in a public place, but generally people aren't reading so that you'll strike up a discussion with them. A lot of times when I'm reading, whether it's the Express or my new favorite novel, I'll angle it so that most people can't read it. It feels like an invasion of privacy when I look up and catch someone else staring at the words on my page. When I'm reading, I'm in my own world, not thinking about the commute or the crowd or how late I'm going to be for my appointment. It's a soothing way to get through the commute, and when my little bit of private space is invaded with an over-the-shoulder reader, my little world collapses and I'm back riding the swaying jerking metro.
Something about over-the-shoulder reading is creepy, I guess for its invasiveness, even though you are in public. But those of you who read anything on the metro - the newspaper, a book, a textbook, a report from work - expect that someone will view what you're doing. It's a tight space and even if others aren't trying to read it, eyes will roam. If there's anything you'd like to keep private (such as a confidential corporate document), don't bring it out to read on the metro.
"A lot of times when I'm reading, whether it's the Express or my new favorite novel, I'll angle it so that most people can't read it. It feels like an invasion of privacy when I look up and catch someone else staring at the words on my page."
ReplyDeleteSeriously? You mean when a bunch of strangers are jammed into a subway car with nothing to look at out the window they should look at anything except for some words in front of them?
Ma'am, I politely suggest that you commute alone in your car if you're going to be so afraid of the public world.
If there's anything you'd like to keep private (such as a confidential corporate document), don't bring it out to read on the metro.
ReplyDelete------------
Well, this part is obvious.
The rest of this post is a little wacky....
In the picture, it looks like the woman is staring straight ahead, not looking over the guy's shoulder.
ReplyDeleteI think this is really the *least* of the etiquette problems on Metro. Maybe you are a little too sensitive about personal space to be on public transit.
I'm encouraged by the sanity of the commenters on this neurotic post. It would actually make a mediocre Onion piece.
ReplyDeleteThere is no such thing as personal space on a crowded metro train. You're going to have to get over this one.
ReplyDeleteThe "brains" behind this blog? That's an overstatement!
ReplyDeleteI can't wait to push my nose into her book!
"Reading over someone's shoulder on the metro is not ok, but it's even worse to then make a comment on it."
ReplyDeleteHmmm??? My experience has been quite the opposite, people are so intent on maintaining their own space and keeping to themselves that they don't even say hello to each other. I find that as disturbing as you find making a commment about a metro rider's reading material. If someone makes a comment, I'm willing to bet they're perhaps new to the Metro system and maybe just being friendly?! Is it really so wrong to attempt to strike up a conversation with a stranger?! Yikes!!! What this area needs is a lot more people interested in their fellow metro rider than the world you believe we should all live in...The cold, dark, anonymous existence where thousands of strangers who all share at least one thing in common everyday, all behaving in an almost robotic manner, showing no interest in those around us...Sorry...I'm not one of those robots nor will I ever be. If seeing things from your point of view is considered proper etiquette, then I'm proud to be human!!! HA! =)
Madam, please realize that when I am looking toward your reading material on Metro, I am really staring at you.
ReplyDeleteIf not medication, perhaps a drink after work to make a dent in this formidable neurosis?
ReplyDeleteChill out.
You can get great privacy screens for your iphone/itouch. No one can see anything if they aren't directly in front of it.
ReplyDelete